I have never considered myself an especially likeable person.
I am not good looking. I am not polished. I well over the hill of mid-life. I am frumpy by nature and working on it. I can be curt, often terse. I answer questions before the asker finishes their sentence.
But I have been accused (is that right word?) of having charisma.
Charisma is an attraction. It’s often intangible. Can’t be quantified, for sure. And it is tough to develop. Even articulate. You either have it or you don’t. You tell me.
Charisma is when people find something they like about you and it’s their reason to be near you.
It’s not because you can teach them something or give them an introduction, that kind of thing.
Charisma is when people WANT to hear you speak. It is a gift that you have that benefits other people.
My best guess for where my charisma has its source is that I genuinely and deeply care about people. And I KNOW something that is completely no-nonsense.
I shave away all the fluff and go directly to the point as quickly and clearly and down-to-earthy as I possibly can.
I value people’s time.
And I want to give them something that will make an immediate and positive change in their life.
And people listen.
To be sure, they don’t always agree. That’s okay.
I don’t care whether people like or hate me (I prefer like) but I don’t want people to be indifferent to me. They aren’t.
If you want charisma, attach yourself to people in some way. You attach yourself to them. Not the other way around.
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You know you want to.